Light My Fire

Traveling with kids on a plane sober is a nightmare. By the time we recovered a total of nine pieces of luggage, picked up our car from the inexpensive parking "off-site", and put on two carseats correctly in the dark of this sketchy Oakland lot surrounded by the meanest looking barbed wire I've ever seen,...we hit the road by 1:30am. The only thing I had going was a couple hours of Jet lag in my favor, I bottle of tejava, and a fatty rolled a week earlier to prepare for times like these. I drank the tejava out of dehydration and on a empty stomach, it got me rocking out to talk radio and wondering exactly how much liner does one have in their stomach? Now traveling with your family one must take precautions like don't fire up that doob until you are on your home stretch. So around 3:30am I bust out the doob only to discover no fire. That's right nothing to lit it with. I woke up my wife like a tweeker, in a panic, "Do you know where some matches are?!" We were in farmland nowhere, a bullfrog made a noise I swear it sounded like ,"gannnn JAH" It was the longest 30 minutes of my life driving home. With everyone asleep except me, I smoked the entire joint outside checking out my garden in the moonlight. I went inside and checked out the pile of mail. The surprise was discovering the box of dried poppies, all 50 of them loosely packaged with the sound of seeds penetrating the box. My ebay connect hooked me up. In the excitement, I spent the next 2 hours into sunrise, crushing them, separating seeds, and grinding them down into powder. At one point, though being tired and high, I thought the seeds all over the table were tiny black ants crawling everywhere,...I knew at that point I had to go to sleep.