Down on Alcohol
I went sober for a month then I recently attended a conference which had very little to do with workshops and more to do with getting together to drink and gamble. So I drank and fell into the same pattern,.. I drank too much and I drank too much because I was gambling and when you are gambling the cocktail waitress keeps coming by and being pro you never want to say no I'm good. Instead I found myself literally pounding beer to kept up with her coming by asking. No story kind of long, I drank to the point I was gambling at 25 dollar blackjack tables and just getting fuzzy on the details of the night. The next day I could feel the impact of the drinking the night before. People would come up to me and ask me how long I stayed playing roulette (I would think roulette?!? I played roulette?!?!) Alcohol is just bad news and my trip confirmed it. I was grateful just to win my money back, some how by the grace of JAH or it might have been that last hand where I doubled down and won over 100 dollars!
The conference was like a proving ground, I proved that I can still drink like a fish but I just didn't care for it. I ended up the last night getting high on Bhang and jacked on caffeine and playing video games instead of drinking and gambling. In the end I woke up without a hangover and without that rotten dirty feeling of losing a bunch of money by gambling it away. Now I'm home and I'm back on the sobriety train, in that I don't drink, please don't get me wrong I still enjoy the altered states of ingesting/smoking herb.