Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Bhang Bhang

My drug of choice is Ganja Bhang. I make up a strong batch for the weekend and drink it all day and all night. I stay optimally high 24/7 and by monday morning while I take a shit at work it smells well kind of like Bhang, like I drank so much of it, my stools are smelling like it! Last weekend I blew my cover a bit, while we were waiting for a Mother's Day table at our favorite restuarant. My dear wife took a swig off the jar and before we had pancakes she was high as a kite. "I thought you drank this whole jar!" she said. I replied,"I do but usually over the course of the day." Now visualize being really high, and your significant other joins you, no biggie right!?! Now add a packed resturant for Mother's Day breakfast and two wild boys hungry as can be. It's a good thing I'm such a pro, most would fold in those kinds of situations. To make thing complicated we had a gift certificate that read "breakfast for two with coffee." Our server said,"Oh we comp everything, if I were you I would order everything on the menu and some togo boxes!" Don't you love servers who screw the business for the sake of a tip! Well we order sides of this and that, extra pancakes, and basically took his advise leaving him a healthy 8 dollar tip. Now imagine eating to capacity at your favorite restuarant, nothing a little bhang couldn't cure. As spent the rest of the day together, I began to feel a little sorry for my dear wife as she kept commenting that she was still high,.. which of course is the point especially for the weekends.

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